A Company Turned The Eggplant Emoji Into A Filthy Dildo Vibrator


What happened to the days when things were made out of necessity? Now, everything has to look cute and adorable and that even goes for sex toys that were only built and made for a woman’s pleasure. Not as some type of adorable keepsake that only a dumb hipster would display on a book shelf rather than hide it in shame under the bed like God intended!

Someone actually took the time to turn the eggplant emoji into a weird dildo vibrator and, well, it still looks like an eggplant. I suppose that’s good news for dudes with weird looking dicks if chicks are turned on by something purple and green!

Unbeknownst to my knowledge, people have actually been using the eggplant emoji but not for what it was originally intended for. Since a literal dick emoji has yet to be invented, the millennials have been using it as such. This is why we can’t have nice things. So it was really only a matter of time before someone decided to make the youngsters dreams come true and actually create a real life emoji eggplant dildo vibrator for the ladies to enjoy. An “emojibator” if you will.

Does this mean the same company will be able to create a fuckable donut for us guys? Not that we would ever fuck a donut. That’d just be way too perfect, I mean weird.

That skanky donut deserves what’s coming to it.

Either way, maybe this could be a great gift for that girl you wanna get with but just need something to really seal the deal in a not-so-aggressive way. The emoji eggplant vibrator as a present could totally be that “Hey, it’s a joke gift!” but at the same time paint a nice image in the minds of the giftee. It’s only $32 if you think it could help you out. Otherwise, just ask your chick if she wouldn’t mind having a threesome with a box of donuts. I mean…what?

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