Two young women in their 20’s, Melina Roberge and Isabelle Lagace of Quebec, Canada have been accused of smuggling $30 million dollars of cocaine into Australia. What kind of filthy, illegal Canucks are crossing borders with that much nose candy? Oh..
They were arrested for smuggling coke and apparently a couple of melons.
Sounds like the women’s prison is about to get a new shipment of fresh MEAT!
The pair had been aboard a luxury cruise ship, The MS Sea Princess, traversing the globe for $20,000 a ticket. They visited fun locals like Peru and French Polynesia where they posted titillating Instagram pics showing off all the fun they were having making us all jealous that they exist and we are not there with them.
Pink is the new stink.
Well it seems that their partying, jet setting life style is over as the Canadian Border Service Agency and the United States Department of Homeland Security tipped off Australian police to the pair of smoking hot “high risk travelers.” And this wasn’t just a heads up from fellow law enforcement officials that they are at high risk of getting boners.
Having stopped in Columbia and Peru, two huge cocaine hubs, officials figured out that the pair were purchasing cocaine at a low amount and then delivering it to be resold in Australia which is known for a HUGE coke price markup. If their plan had gone off without a hitch they would have stood to make $30 Million. Chaching! That is a LOT of margaritas and lower back tattoos.
They should have hid the coke in the cave.
However, the busty babes were BUSTED when the cruise ship arrived into the port of Australia and they were met by sniffer dogs, border agents and FEDERAL police. In the girls’ suitcases, along with another passenger’s luggage, that of a 63 year-old man named Andre Tamine, authorities found 200 pounds of cocaine. That is enough fun powder to put the lovely ladies in prison FOR LIFE. The gentleman traveler has yet to be connected to the girls. Maybe he just also happened to be smuggling the C dust.
Like I said, the maximum penalty for this level of drug trafficking is LIFE IN PRISON. That should be completely horrifying for someone in their 20’s. However, let’s be honest: a couple of attractive young girls like this will probably get the Brock Turner treatment when it comes to sentencing. I guarantee it. They will be out in time for Spring Break next year and ready to do a couple lines of blow just for old time’s sake. Party!
Follow Phil Haney on Twitter @PhilHaney