There’s nobody more creative than a lonely guy who’s looking to get his rocks off, but as one man painfully learned, there are good ways and there are horrifyingly bad ways to do so. This unfortunate soul decided to stick his manhood into a plastic bottle as part of his self-pleasure ritual, but he ended up getting his penis stuck inside for four days – until it had to get amputated altogether.
The 50-year-old man was apparently not having any luck wooing an intimate partner, so instead, he was enticed by the curves of a plastic water bottle. He quickly realized that something was wrong when he could not remove his penis from the vice grip of his new lover, but he was too embarrassed to seek help.
For nearly a week, the fap trap caused his penis to undergo necrosis by cutting off the supply of blood to his member and leaving its cells to starve to death. The man finally went to the hospital when his penis had turned black and begun to decompose. The damage was done and his doctor made the devastating decision to remove his penis entirely.
“When he arrived four days later, we had to amputate the penis completely, because it was completely dead,” the doctor said at a press conference.
“The situation with this patient is that he didn’t get the medical attention in time and this caused the penis to begin to decay and die completely. There was no choice but to completely remove the penis,” he continued, adding that “the necrosis was very severe.”
Despite the morbid humor surrounding this poor man’s story, you might be surprised to learn that people getting their penises stuck in bottles is pretty common. Most men’s natural reaction is to panic, but if you should ever find yourself in such a compromise situation, try to relax. Taking a cold shower could help to completely remove any erotic thoughts that are contributing to the problem, and it could also divert some of the blood in the penis to a more desirable location.
Flexing your thigh muscles for a long period of time can also help to calm things down enough to remove your member from whatever prison it found itself in. The thigh muscles trick is also very handy when it comes to eliminating those unwanted erections that pop up out of the blue, so there’s something for every man to learn even if you’re not looking get frisky with a bottle.
Getting your penis stuck in something is not the only reason why you might have to get it amputated, by the way. The incredibly rare but nightmarish case of penile cancer can actually happen, and it could result in an emasculating surgery.
Dave Harrison noticed what appeared to be a pimple on his penis and thought nothing of it until it started growing more painful by the day. Doctors diagnosed it as a tumor and broke the news to the devastated husband that he would have to go under the knife to get it – and a chunk of his penis – removed. Naturally, the aftermath was difficult to deal with.
For men who suffer a complete penile amputation, psychological trauma is sadly common and day-to-day life changes in a number of ways one might not expect. Sex can become difficult to impossible. Many amputees suffer from phantom pains and the fleeting sensation that it’s still there.
However, science may soon provide a reliable solution for people who had their penises amputated. Mohammad Abad was famously outfitted with the world’s first bionic penis in 2012. The $85,000 device uses a series of tubes inside the penis that can be filled with liquid by pressing a button in his testicles, allowing him to finally lose his virginity at age 44. Earlier this year, the first successful penis transplant in the United States took place.